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Sir Isaac would be proud of the old place.

British Columbia: half a world apart from West Kirby.

Move to Canada? Pourquoi (see, I’ve picked up un petit peu of one of the official lingos)? Well…it all started…(fade to shimmery flashback)…actually the way it was happened was very simple. My first wife and I were living in Neston at the time and (I think I have this in the right chronological order) I had just taken a job which entailed me travelling ALL the way to Warrington each day.

Looking back, the idea of that being a long commute is comical now, when I live in a country where the distances are of another magnitude entirely.

Anyhoo, we put our house up for sale and, having only very recently purchased our first internet capable computer (this was only 1999 for goodness’ sake), we decided to see what the asking price would buy us elsewhere. Having decided against all manner of lovely and not-so-lovely places around the world, we found some startling properties here in BC, and pretty soon we were hooked…it became a “well we’ll never know if we don’t try” kind of idea, and one that we felt we’d kick ourselves for if we didn’t give it a go. It all happened in a few hours really – the decision part at least. It took us another three years to actually make the move.

So, my old pal, I’m happy to say it was not my grief at being spurned by you (careful if you read that out loud) which prompted my leap across the pond (and a continent)…and I’ve never lived so far from the ocean (approx 45 miles at the moment).

How very dare you!

Newton, Sir!? Newton!!?? How very dare you!?

Newton, need I remind you, looks like this:-

Newton. On a good day.

No, I live in West Kirby. The sleepy little seaside village I mentioned earlier. Which I think you’ll recall looks like this:-

West Kirby, as seen from the Marine Lake.

After we left school (and I can confirm I did stop speaking to you in 1983 – though quite involuntarily), I went to College in Leicester, got kicked out, came home, moved back to Leicester, came home, went to College in Wales, came home, lived in France, came home, moved to Watford, came home. And I’ve lived here ever since. All that moving around was making me feel quite queasy.

So, why on earth did you end up in Canada? Just to avoid me?